There are no absolute answers and nothing is true under all conditions — meet people where they are
We are full-spectrum human beings, all at different places on our path. Every place that every person stands is absolutely unique. Yet, we have an insatiable hunger for absolutes.
There is never one all-powerful truth, for all of us. There are trillions upon trillions of powerful truths, floating around. They are changing all the time. And they don’t always match the other truths. There is nothing wrong with any of them. They are not good or bad. They are all just doing their part to serve the highest good of whoever they are inspiring, at this moment.
We demand that there be the truth. We want the truest truth there is. We want the truth so true that it will be true forever, no matter what. We demand that we know the truth. And, once we ‘know’ it, we demand that others agree with it.
There are many things that we perceive as bad or wrong that actually serve us at some place in time. We could find an untrue example of any truth or ideal.
Let’s take, for example, anger. Particularly anger towards someone who is negatively impacting your life. Of course, it is infinitely better to part ways with someone in a harmonious manner. But sometimes, that is impossible. And, in those cases, anger is there to help.
Have you ever been in that soul crushing relationship? You know, that one that changed you, forever. Have you ever been with someone, be it romantic or otherwise, who is decidedly terrible for you — yet you cannot bring yourself to leave them? Have you ever known deep in the pit of your stomach, without a doubt, that someone is sucking your spirit dry — yet you love them so fiercely that you fear you may sacrifice your whole self before you become willing to walk away?
Well, if you haven’t, the English language will not do my point justice. But I will say that this is a pain that stretches far beyond measure. It is an unbearable cognitive dissonance — one which many never break free of. And sometimes, in these situations, the only way you can leave is mad as hell.
This is when anger is a dear and life-saving friend. Sometimes, if you don’t allow yourself to leave mad, you will never leave at all.
This is what I mean when I talk about the full-spectrum of human nature — it’s not about dismissing any part of ourselves, but balancing all parts. And the truth about the truth is that there are no absolutes.
You can see across my various social media platforms that some posts directly contradict others, in certain context. In fact, you could take any sentence that I have published and find another that contradicts it — some way to make it wrong. But my presence isn’t just for and about me, it is for and about everyone. And life, put simply, just is not that black and white.
Not everyone is where I am and not everyone needs what I need, right now. Some people need what I needed two years ago and some people need what I have yet to identify with. So we share different messages from different parts of the journey, and trust that people will find what is helpful to them. Because there is no ultimate truth that is true for all people at all times, and sometimes you just can’t get there from there.
I say this with all due respect to the world of self improvement and spiritually minded people…
Stop presuming to know the absolute answers for others. You don’t. You never will. Neither will I. And, quite frankly, life would be boring and monotonous if we did.
Written by Holly Kellums